Hiatus

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|Credits|C.L.|A stranger|

It took me three months to finish what you’re seeing above. And don’t expect too much. Haha 😛 It was just a product of my sleepless nights or tiresome days. And it’s starting to stress me out because I can’t think of the stroke nor the color I would apply on the Moon and the space surrounding it.

Mali ba ko ng concept?

Magulo lang ba talaga ko mag-isip?

Or walang kwenta lang talaga yung kinulayan ko. Haha

O sadyang walang pwedeng magpuno ng nararamdaman ko.. habang iginuguhit ko ‘to.

Hiatus.

A very interesting word.

Break.

Parang yung panahon na kinain mo yung cupcake na pinadala ng nanay mo para sa recess time niyo sa school.

Walang masyadong espesyal na handog ang post na ‘to.

Isa lamang ‘tong pagkilala sa salitang hiatus na nagsasabing hindi masamang magpahinga.

Lalo na kung pagod ka na.

(Kasi nasira ang dryer niyo at nagkataong ikaw yung nakatokang maglaba.)

Gumana ka na po. 😦 HAHA

Utang na le-erb.

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Salt. And Tequila.

“When life gives you lemons, add salt and tequila.”

 

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|Photo Credit|K.P.|

 

They said when life throws you lemons, turn it into a grape juice and let the world think how you did it.. BUT that is a very long process my friend. And while you are into that process, might as well add some salt and tequila for the meantime so you won’t miss the fun.

I was a little doomed and restless for the past few weeks. I couldn’t sleep much. (But I still eat a lot kahit kunware nagdidiet. Haha) I couldn’t even think straight at work, I even lose a grip of a whole lot journey (but at the back of my head, I’m thinking it was the right decision at that point. **in many ways** ..learning things and how complicated our mediocre but meticulous brain works that it could really kill people. Believe me that was a lot. Apologies to people who have given their genuine trust and heart-felt effort. However, I want to thank each soul who were my constant variable at one of my scribbled situations. Maraming Salamat po.)

And that I ignored the fact that I was losing my grip because I chosed to. I have forgotten that there are people who are kind enough to listen to my sentiments and who could value relationship, time and presence. It was my fault. That I ended screwing my space.

Then, here comes His little wave of magic: He sent the right people, at the right time. People who would be your salt and tequila. And again, Thank you.

Thank you for reminding me how to value oneself again..how to appreciate time ..how to laugh  (so hard that you could have grown some muscles on your cheeks) ..how to get back on track ..how to chase for such forgotten dreams.

|…|

P.S. It’s still my dream to take Cookie Monster on a cookie date. 🙂

And I’m on my way.

Again.

Kwentong Kamay

“Ang kamay na bumitaw sa’yo ay hindi makakawala kung hawak hawak pa rin ‘to ng kamay mo..”

Hugot. Oo na sige na. Pero may tama naman sa sinabi ko..haha (ipush ko pa opinion ko)

Sino bang gustong bitawan? Sino bang gustong iwanan? Sino bang gustong masaktan? Kung meron man, siya yung totoong bato, hindi ako. Haha syempre wala! Walang may gustong umiyak habang nasa jeep. Umiyak sa library o opisina ng patago. Umiyak sa banyo bago maligo. Umiyak sa gabi na parang wala ng sisikat na araw kinabukasan. Wala talaga. Wala.

Pero kailan ba tayo nasasaktan? Kapag nasugatan? Kapag nawalan? Kapag iniwanan?

Maraming tanong. Maraming lumalarong tanong sa isipan. Pero sana huwag mong kalimutan, na habang hinahanap mo ang mga sagot sa tanong mo, pilit niya ring sinasagutan ang isang malaking palaisipan, na parang walang katapusan.

Sabi nga, ang kamay na hinampas mo sa pader, kahit gaano katigas ‘to, parehas lang din kayong naramdaman, kahit mukhang wala siyang pakialam.

Siguro, sa lahat din naman ng bagay dalawang panig ang sangkot. Hindi lang isa, dalawa. Minsan nga tatlo o higit pa. Hindi lang ikaw, pati rin naman siya.

Parehas may rason at dahilan. Parehas may pinanghuhugutan. Parehas may pinanggagalingan. Parang itim at puti. Yin at Yan. (tama ba) Kutsara at tinidor. Balde at tabo. Kanin at ulam. Papel at pluma. Po at Opo.

Kaya sa dalawang kamay na minsang mahigpit na nakahawak sa isa’t isa, dumarating sa puntong meron at merong mapapagod. Napapagod at bumibitaw. Bumitaw siya, eh ikaw, hinawakan mo pa rin ba? O sadyang ikaw din bumitaw na.

Dahil ang kamay na bumitaw sa’yo ay hindi makakawala kung hawak hawak pa rin ‘to ng kamay mo..

Pero ganun talaga. Masakit. Kaya minsan mapapamura ka nalang sa sakit. Hanggang sa humugot ka nalang kahit ang bitter ng pakinggan. Pero ang mahalaga dun, ginawa mo ang lahat para kumapit. Kumapit ka parin na para kang nakikisabit sa jeep, kahit nakakapagod na, kahit mukha ka ng tanga sa mata ng iba. Para sa oras na dumating sa puntong bababa ka na, handa ka ng isigaw:

“Manong drayber, Para!”

Hindi dahil sa pagod ka na. Kundi dahil alam mo sa sarili mong:

“Eto na ‘to, Tama na. P*%@#!&@!”

Oh, ako na naman yung bitter. Haha hindi ba pwedeng hugot para sa ibang taong nasaktan? 😛

Osya, pagaling na kayo! Kaya niyo yan. 🙂

A man without dreams

A man without dreams doesn’t dream at all. He just sleeps, faces the dawn, soils his body and when sunset comes, he closes his eyes again.

A man without dreams doesn’t think. Because if he does, there will be a chain of consequences, results, hardships and most of all changes. A man without dreams doesn’t change. And he doesn’t think. Where the fuck are your brain cells?

A man without dreams hurt people. Why? Because he’s selfish. He doesn’t allow people to have chances. To grow. To love. To think. To change. To dream. He doesn’t even know how to give himself a chance to do all things. He just lives.

A man without dreams lives alone. He’s a lonely man.

A man without dreams is a chaos. Because he spreads nothing.

But how does a man without dreams, dream nothing?

Maybe because he doesn’t want to dream at all? Nor he wants to chase any opportunity. Nor he lives with idealism. He just lives. And when fate comes, he simply goes back to dust. And the wind blows him away.

And I hope nobody inhales him.

Or maybe, he doesn’t dream at all because his dreams failed him. And it took his time away.

So maybe he’s not a man without dreams.

He is a man who lost his dreams.

-a very sad thought.

A piece of every little thing

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|inkedweddings|

It’s been awhile when I used to shoot a lot of poems on my page. I guess, it doesn’t fit the boarders right now. Just to begin with the forthcoming busy road I’m about to conquer for the next days, weeks and months, I want to start it with a brief but a meaningful thought (at least to me) towards my endeavours and its means.

 

When I started to write on web, that was Tumblr days. No, actually it started way back in Friendster era. It had been my serene vessel where I can freely put up all my unsaid or unwritten thoughts. Until I jumped into Tumblr, and I finally found such a comfortable home here, in WordPress. I have different reasons why I’ve created each account. But one thing is common… they are all my thoughts. They are part of my memory.

 

In the next days to come, the auto-publish system in WordPress will make up my blog. I might gain some notifications and stuff. And I’ll always be thankful that, one would actually run my page and do some reading. I appreciate it. Thank you.

 

This will be the last phase for my academic course, and I’m quite sure it’ll be as hard as a rock, difficult as an unsolved puzzle…And I’m hoping that I’ll get through all these. As much as I want to check on my page, it feels sad that I might not be able to do my stuff and my other stuff, all at the same time, because writing has been my recourse every single day, especially for bad days. I’m not saying I’ll be gone forever. There’s no such thing as forever. *laughs* Lifetime, it is.

 

But hey, I’m as unpredictable as what I’ve heard once. I might just pop in once in a while for a personal touch. J Good luck to all of us. And the auto-button begins in 5…4…3…2…1…

 

 

Just a paper

I’m looking at this piece of paper
Thinking of what words to be engraved
Mantling the pieces, left and concealed
And hell to heaven—-
It’s taking me forever to fill out the lines
Paper, paper, you tell me..

(And every thing just went off and blank.)

-Silly feeling. Just so silly.