Vagabond

“I want to be someone’s memory rather than a daily routine.”

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|Photo Credits|E.N|

 

Before I eat another cookie, I would like to say thank you to all the gods and deities who made this week a little extraordinary than my daily routine. Reminding me that I have a 24-hour right to breathe and to forget about all the turmoils. And it made me think somehow. It made me think of good things.

Somebody asked me, what’s your wish on your special day? I answered:

World peace.

Maybe it humored him a bit and asked again, what’s your wish? For yourself. And I answered:

Inner peace.

 

I wish for everyone’s peace of mind. Because that will help them to regain health.

I wish for my inner peace so I can extend myself more to others.

Few months ago, I spoke to one of my colleagues (she’s a good friend too) in the balcony where I usually drench myself at lunch. She said looking at the skyline, she wanted to make a dent and to create a change. It’s a great thought, I’d say. And I told her to pursue her dreams. She’s continuing her studies now and I hope for all the blessings and odds to be on her side. She’s a good kid.

And it made me think…

I also want to make a dent. But not that big. Nor to create a change in large scale.

My lifetime will never be enough:

tile

But a simple dent to someone’s heart.

A dent that couldn’t change everything but could remind that person from time to time that it’s okay.

That it’s okay to eat pizza with a lot of pepper. That it’s okay to drink Chuckie even if you turn 80. That it’s okay to cry in public. That it’s okay to be hurt. (Because sooner or later it will be okay.) That it’s okay to get nightmares. That it’s okay to get tired. (Simply because we’re human.) That it’s okay to get crazy in love. It’s okay to commit mistakes. (As long as you treat it as a friendly reminder the next day.) That it’s okay to be in pain. (It strengthens your soul.)

It’s okay. It’s okay because that’s how life works.

(And I just used the word “okay” thirteen times. Haha)

I want to be someone’s memory rather than a daily routine.

P.S.

Thank you for all the greetings! God bless you all. 🙂

 

**And why Vagabond? Wala lang. Gusto ko lang yung word. Haha It describes exactly my thoughts. Blog ko naman ‘to kaya walang pakialamanan sa titulo.

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….

Ang lumanay ng bati ko sa umaga, tapos “pakyu-pakyu” yung isasagot mo? Kaibigan kita, but I have my limitations. At nasagad yun ngayon. Pasensya na kaibigan. I don’t have time for empty talks right now. I’m overthinking. I’m even sorting my way out. At least the decency to listen and kind words would really help. And hey, it’s free. It won’t cost you anything.

 

(Stop. I don’t like your words.)

Kailan?

Kailan titila ang pagbuhos ng ulan
Na akala mo’y wala ng mapaglagyan

Kailan mahahawi ang kalangitan
Para dumungaw ang araw, at ngiti’y muling masilayan

Kailan guguhit ang pitong tulay ng kalangitan
Na siyang kukulay sa magulong kaisipan

Kailan, kailan..
Kailan muling guguhit
Ang mga ngiting hindi umiimik

Kailan, kailan..
Kailan titila ang malakas na pagbuhos
Ang pusong nadurog na ng lubos

Kailan, kailan..
Kailan masasagot ang mga katanungan
Mga bagay na pilit pinahahalagahan
Unti unti nang nabubura ng tubig ulan

Tama na, pagod na pagod na
Wala ka bang balak magpahinga?

Kailan, kailan
Kailan titila ang napakalakas na ulan
Para muling umukit ng bahaghari na animo’y walang katapusan

(Yung body clock ko po ay wala na sa matinong kalagayan..parang yung isip kong lumilipad patungo sa nakaraan at pilit gumigising para sa kasalukuyan.. At para paghandaan ang kinabukusan.)

Unfinished thought

There would always be an unfinished matter. School, workload, chores. Or the undying unfinished thoughts at night.

When I was in high school, I tend to wait for my late night thoughts to subside before I encourage my little nerves to sleep. Maybe because high school hasn’t brought yet the verge of life. But it’s still a life. A very vital part of what you’ve become today. But as you grow older, priorities change, responsibilities seem to look bigger, terrain spreads wider and circumstances become malignant.

So after getting out of the sweety-easy life in high school, it brings you to a wilder phase of life. Wilder because remember those flesh-eating mammals in Africa you see in National Geographic Channel?  That’s why. Survival.

But in the midst of such roaring canine, it’s a start of a deep understanding of wilderness.

And those late night thought? Unfinished thoughts?

You would realize, it’s the most beautiful thing you could imagine when restlessness eats you up.

You would realize that high school could be somewhat secluded, but it reminds you how to be soft, to be warm, to be like a kid who’s vulnerable and sweet and kind and a lot more.

‘Thus, unfinished thoughts.

Well, some thoughts are meant to be unfinished.

Who knows?